Common Sense is Not So Common

Every now and again I am reminded of my favorite quote. Voltaire's statement seems so apropos, that I go back to my list of favorite quotes and reread them all over again to touch up on perspective.  

Whether it's in my day job, in politics, in parenting, it's amazing how often I shake my head at how similar and dissimilar we can be. And I wonder. Which side of the 'common sense' do I fall on? 

As I'm writing, I'm also watching the TV series, "Who do you think you are?". Following the ancestors of Steve Buscemi and even thinking back to my ancestors, I now ask myself, who defines 'common sense'?  The enterprising men and women who leave their homelands in hopes of a better future amaze me. The hardships and tribulations that they have gone through have me wondering what they were thinking.  Had they listened to 'common sense', this country would be a different place.  

Is there any 'common sense' that you didn't follow and it turned out to be the best thing you've done? 

~Melissa

"Common sense is not so common." ~Voltaire

Energy

A squirrel made a nest in my flower box over the winter. I was amazed watching her add to her new home every day. My fake flowers disappeared and reappeared in the intertwined blanket of leaves, branches, and fake ivy. While I missed the pretty flowers, I thought the little critter who had burrowed her way into my home and heart needed them more.

A baby squirrel has now joined our family and has quite actively taken on her mother’s endeavor to build a better nest.  More fake flowers are disappearing and the little one is quite active in her exercise.  The energy of youth came back is a very real reminder.

I have two cats who love to watch the antics of both squirrels and all seem to have made  place for themselves in our disfunctional family.

My daughter also joins in as we watch the nest building. She is not quite as impressed as I am, for she builds her own nests thoughout our home. Currently, she has a nest of blankets and pillows in the middle of our living room floor where she’s opened a very large umbrella to enclose her nest. The peace and serenity she enjoys brings a smile to my face.

The energy of the squirrels, of my cats and my daughter flows through me and inspires me. While I am not as active psychically as they are while they enjoy their antics, my mind is active in its pursuit of plot, characters and motivations.

Our capacity to build, expand, seek out new lands and adventures in pursuit of a better life for us and our young is not only human nature, but animal nature as well. This addition of our squirrel and now her baby have given me a glimpse into the building of a community. Strangers with different motivations and pursuits coming together and living harmoniously in a small space.

Energy.  What moves you? Physically and mentally?

~Melissa

‘Don’t’ and the million words that precede or follow...

How many times do you use the word 'don’t'?

I wondered that myself when I caught myself saying it to my daughter in a moment of epiphany.  Whether it’s preceded or followed, is ‘don’t’ always negative?

“Don’t do…”

“Don’t be…”

“Why don’t you…”

“How come you don’t…”

Words are powerful. The way we put them together, the way we say them and the way we feel them determine their impact and how important they are to us.

But maybe ‘don’t’ isn’t all bad…

A friend and author, Rachel Firasek, just recently blogged “Don’t hide from life.”  This really hit me right in the middle of my forehead.  I finished writing my first book and realized that I had put so much of myself into it, that I’d withdrawn into my own writing world so much that even friends and family recognized my absence from reality. Her post was pretty powerful at a moment when I needed to see it the most.

My lesson: Finding balance is critical in all things. And ‘don’t’ isn’t always bad.  Sometimes it’s a wakeup call.

~Melissa

Reference:
Rachel’s blog post: http://shywriters.blogspot.com/2011/04/rachel-firasekgrab-life.html

Cheerios

I didn't know how important Cheerios were until I became a Mom. When I learned that carrying around a container of Cheerios could instantly entertain and satisfy the hungers of a toddler on the verge of crossing over into hell-child, I never left the house without this golden elixer of choice.

Well, my toddler has grown past the Cheerios phase, but the Cheerios equivalent has grown in scope and price to my Smartphone. Oh, and now, it's me, instead of my dear daughter, who has need. This 3 x 3 mass of technical knowhow and speed has been a lifesaver over the last several years, yes, replacing the yellow plastic container, with red lid, engraved with Cheerios around the middle.

A map with navigation? Check.
Traffic delays? Check.
Texting? Check.
Internet? Check.
Calendar? You bet you're where am I? Check.
Twitter? Tweet yes, Check.
Facebook? Friend me how do I know you again? Check.
Google? Google me bad. Check.
Games? Jackpot. Check.
Editing my novel on the go? Now we're talking. Check.

What can't this thing do for me? I now have a whole new addiction. I can't be away from my phone. It connects me to the hive out there in the cloud. The sea of nameless places and faces who are reaching out, trying to connect with someone else as well. I must now be in constant communication with someone, I don't know who, but they're out there. Waiting for me to respond, just as I'm as eager for them to enlighten me with their wisdom.

I've found my adult Cheerios. Except this label says Droid. I can disconnect when I'm sleeping.

~Melissa

Band-aid

Continuing on with the A-Z Blog challenge, B is for Band-aid.

My daughter always begs me for a band-aid whenever she bumps an arm or leg or even thinks she felt a bump. My first question is usually “Are you bleeding?” Most of the time the answer is ‘no’.  She still thinks that a band-aid is needed and I usually give in and cover a scrape that heals with a warm washcloth.

So, in writing…When do I apply a band-aid to fix a minor problem or pull out the thick bandages, or gulp, grab the scissors for some major stitching?

I’m having trouble deciding on whether I want to look at my first novel as one that only needs band-aid fixes, or whether it needs a major overhaul.  I can’t decide, so instead, I’ve put it aside and plotted out two other books and thinking about the third.  It’s my first book, so I’m especially attached and just proud of the darn thing because it was a fevered, compelling accomplishment for me. 350 pages of sweat and tears went into it.  It’s tough to tell how much of it really needs to be repaired.

Soon, I’ll go back for another look, but until then. The band-aids and the scissors are sitting quietly next to my computer.

~Melissa

A is for Anonymous

Blogging has been a challenge for me, so I'm following other great authors in the blogging A-Z challenge to get me started. 

A is for Anonymous.  Before I started writing, the world of books was a place for me to escape into. I love to be taken away into other peoples lives where I can be a fly on the wall and watch characters work through problems and find love.

Since taking up the pen, I've found that the author community is not anonymous. I've met so many wonderful people who are for lifting up each other and it truly warms my soul.  I've met authors who have now become part of my daily life and have become great friends. The romance community feels like a sisterhood where great exchanges of ideas and resources lifts us up. How amazing is that?

After I finished my first manuscript and began submitting it to agents and editors, I realized that I am truly no longer anonymous. My name has been attached to the written word. I've created a part of me for others to see. I am no longer anonymous. I'm still in a state of wonder because of it.

~Melissa

Words

Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, But Words Will Never Hurt Me.

A childhood phrase that everyone knows.

Words.

If only words didn't hurt us. Unfortunately, we all know words can hurt us very deeply. Words can lift us up and make us fly or beat us down and destroy our soul. They can even kill.

As a writer, I know words evoke certain feelings and images depending on how they are written. The written word leaves feelings that stay with us long after the story has been read. We think about them, ponder for days on what they truly mean.

Songwriters, politicians, clergyman, policemen, teachers, doctors.  Their words when spoken have meaning to us. Family, friends, mentors, they all elicit feelings from their words as well.  Helpful, hurtful, engaging, disenfranchising. Pick one or more. Emotions balance heavily on their scales depending on a well chosen word.

Words can be very powerful and inspiring. Or they can leave us with thought provoking mysteries that can only be reconciled within ourselves.

Yesterday, I attended a funeral for a great man who was killed as a result of words. The exact words that prompted his fine, learned young son to react uncharacteristically to words of another, causing several deaths, we'll never know. But the resulting tragedy that occurred is felt by those who remain. The mother of the child reminded me of the power of words and I am now forever changed.

Words, and the emotions attached to them, can linger for a moment or for a lifetime. Some even last many lifetimes. They affect not only the speaker, but the recipient and can even be passed along a chain of people, affecting and effecting many.

The power of Words.

They can hurt us.

May we use them well.
~Melissa